We all know her, the girl that just always seems to be single. She’s going out on dates, she’s meeting people but nothing really seems to stick. And anybody that’s around her for long really doesn’t seem to know why. She’s funny, she’s charismatic, she’s smart as hell but, for some reason no one seems to stay around long.
I’ll admit it. I’m one of the perpetually single girls. Now, I don’t mean perpetually single in a sense that I’ve never had a relationship. I have. However none of them have lasted very long. I had one “long-term” relationship that lasted just under two years and it was in high school. Yup, my high school relationship has been my longest one thus far.. I’m that girl (go me! *sigh*). All of my relationships since then have all lasted less than a year, most of them no more than 6 months or so. One of them I did date over and over again for a really long period of time (not something I would recommend… just trust me on this) but, it was never a long amount of time at once. And, I’m usually single for at least a year in between each relationship. Not always, but usually.
I will say that being perpetually single does have its pros and cons! Let’s name a few, shall we?
Pro: I don’t have to share my bed with another person.
Honestly, this is pretty great. Do you know how many of my friends complain about their significant other hogging the blankets, snoring, kicking them in their sleep? Literally all of them. Meanwhile I’m spread out in my bed, snoring like a damn tree trimmer and enjoying every bit of it <3.
Con: I do have to share a bed with my 105lb German Shepherd.
Let me tell ya, he takes up more space than I do. I’d like to think that if there was another human involved he would get the hint and sleep in his dog bed, but if it’s just me I can’t really tell him no. You haven’t seen his face, you can’t say no to it. And he snores louder and moves more than any human I’ve ever met.
Pro: I don’t have to plan my day / life around another person’s schedule.
If I want to randomly buy a ticket to go on a trip, I can and not worry about if it’s ruining someone else’s plans. Whenever my friends and I try to make plans that include everyone we constantly have to plan around their and their spouse’s schedules just to be able to see each other, while I don’t have that issue.
Con: I don’t have an automatic date for events.
Weddings without a date when you’ve been invited with a plus one is the WORST. I mean, I have plenty of guy friends that I can take if I have to but it really isn’t the same. And holiday parties when you’re single? They’re pretty much torture.
Pro: I don’t have to spend a ton more on holidays & birthdays (and for anniversaries).
Honestly, I’ve seen some of the gifts that my friends have gotten for their spouses for holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries…and holy shit. Ain’t nobody got time for that. I’m not a very good gift giver as it is. I’d much rather give time and go do something together than to give a present. And I just don’t see why someone would want to spend money on things when they can spend it on experiences.
Con: I don’t have a significant other to share certain experiences with.
I’m at the time in my life where I’m traveling more and I’d rather go exploring the city than to go out at night. I want to make memories vs. having a bunch of nights that I got so drunk I can’t remember them. And when I’m camping in the Jemez Mountains in New Mexico, or hiking in my home state, or whatever it is that I’m doing it would be really great to have someone by my side to just take it all in with.
For real, I could go on and on about the benefits and the issues that I have with being perpetually single. But honestly, at this time in my life I wouldn’t change it. I’m only 25 so I’m not rushing anything but I’m not against finding someone either. I like having my alone time and I’m not trying to see that go but it’d be pretty stellar to find someone to share my “alone-ness” with (if that even makes sense).
I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.